The Golden Phoenix

Beastmaster Episode Review

In which there are parachute pants.

What Happened

Dar is attacked by Prince Garuda, who accuses him of losing a Golden Urn that was entrusted to the Sulas. Garuda is the son of the sun, and needs the urn to complete his reincarnation. The Urn was stolen when Dar's tribe was massacred and has fallen into the hands of King Zad's duplicitous war-chief, who is summoning up the nerve to plot rebellion against his king. Dar gets it back and returns it to Garuda, who immolates himself then is reborn as the Golden Phoenix.

The Good

• Marton Csokas.
• Tao trying to get Kodo and Podo to lead him to the missing Dar.
• Fantastic fight between Dar and Garuda. Beautifully shot.
• Sela bites Kord as he holds her as a human shield against Dar. Good for her.

The Bad

• "It is a good day to die." Kiefer Sutherland you are not, Garuda.
• For one thing, Kiefer Sutherland doesn't wear parachute pants.
• Kord fights dirty by pulling a knife, then complains when Ruh shows up?

The Cliche

• Tao spots Garuda's sacred place. Because it's just that easy.
• Greedy Kord goes back for his loot, where Zad is waiting to give him a nice scar to remember being stupid by.
• Dar has to wait out a dramatic commercial break before he can actually hand over the Urn. We know Garuda isn't going to kill him; just finish the episode already.

Best Lines

Zad: "At times my ardor overwhelms me."
Sorceress: "Is it bothering you especially today?" She sounds like she's asking about his hemorrhoids.

What Did I Think?

Average episode balancing politics in Zad's kingdom with a mythic adversary for Dar to contend with. It's tough to take Garuda seriously in htat outfit, but Marton Csokas as Kord is his typically effective warrior thug.