A New Dawn

Beastmaster Episode Review

In which everything comes to an end.

What Happened

King Zad makes a final assault on Dar's village Arakann, egged on by Balcifer, who demands that Zad find the key to opening the Crystal Ark before Dar does. Dartanus points out to Dar and Tao that the moon is out of alignment and predicts that if they cannot release Dar's family before an oncoming eclipse, Balcifer will rule all. Yes. It would have been nice of him to come out with this information a lot sooner.

Dar and Tao journey to the grave of Dar's father, where they find the key to open the Crystal Ark: a ring buried with him. Too bad Zad has been lurking in the bushes. He picks a fight and snatches the ring away from Dar. As Dar pursues him, Balcifer appears. Balcifer decides to cut his losses where Zad is concerned. Taking the ring, he dumps Zad into a big fiery hole.

Balcifer strides into Arakann, determined to find the Ark and destroy it. He is attacked by Dartanus, who - as usual - gets his butt kicked. Again, Dar keeps Balcifer from killing Dartanus and engages Balcifer in a sword fight. He bests Balcifer and reclaims the ring. By placing the ring on the Ark, Dar frees his family and traps Balcifer within the Ark.

His quest over, Dar journeys with his family to a new kingdom to rule in peace.

What We Learned

• It's easy to take out your enemies with simple traps made of vines, rocks and sharpened sticks.
• When in doubt, blame your soothsayer.
• Sending whole armies does tend to get better results than piddly little six man squads.
• It's the season finale, you should not be surprised they've attacked in force.
• Zad and Balcifer have different definitions of "success."
• Don't promise what you can't deliver.
• Tao being mean to Dartanus is fun.
• When in doubt, ask your ferrets.
• Watch where you step when exploring people's crypts.
• When in doubt, hide in the bushes.
• You can always count on Zad's vanity to lead him astray.
• Big fire pits in the ground are really scary; lousy blue-screen effects are not.
• Lost causes are the only ones worth fighting for.

What Did I Think?

If "Life is what happens when you're making other plans," why have they spent the last season running around following instructions in a book of prophecies so that Dar can fulfill his pre-decided destiny?