The Girl With Two Breasts

Coupling Episode Review

In which there is a Nudity Buffer.

What Happened

Jeff, Steve and Patrick ogle a woman at the bar. After watching for an hour, Jeff finally manages to talk to her. As he gets to the part about the bucket of women's ears, it turns out... she doesn't speak English.

The next night, Jeff strikes up another one-sided conversation. As she doesn't understand a word he says, he goes ahead and says all the words he's been afraid will slip out in conversation. She thinks he's adorable. Unfortunately, his pretty woman becomes convinced that he's more interested in her interpreter Alice than in her. She sweetly agrees to set up Alice and Jeff on a date the next night. She also teaches him how to say "breasts" in Hebrew.

In the end, she offers to take him home for the night - but Jeff utterly misunderstands and misses his chance. When Alice shows up to meet Jeff the next night, it... doesn't go so well.

What We Learned

• Jeff needs breasts with brains.
• Not individual brains, of course. Not a brain each.
• Rule One of Playing It Cool: Only smile at her face.
• All this hearing is just reading for lazy people.
• A woman's breast are a journey. Her feet are the destination.
• She's not meant for a man like Jeff. He's meant for someone plump and organized.
• Richard Coyle can speak a foreign language. Or at least fake it pretty well.

What Did I Think?

I think it's a rule: everyone sounds more interesting in a foreign language.