Corn Man

Pretender Episode Review

In which we realize that graveyards are always covered in mist.

What Happened

Jarod impulsively buys a cam-corder at a pawn shop and recovers the tape. The pleasant mother-daughter bonding trip ends when they are attacked by an unknown man. Rather than inform the authorities, he uses the tape as a guide to a small Arizona town where they were staying.

There's the usual collection of shifty lawmen, arguing brothers, and a weird little man who claims that there is a curse on strangers in Slade, stemming from a brutal murder years ago. The steel guitar on the soundtrack finds this very important.

Having found Nancy's drivers licence, Jarod goes to visit her husband Ted, who claims that he talked to his family this morning. Jarod overhears him calling someone and discovers that Nancy and Leigh were worth quite a bit in insurance money. Finally deciding to go to the cops, Jarod notices that the sheriff is Ted's best friend and bolts.

When the Sheriff and Ted accuse Jarod of being the kidnapper, it comes out that the women are being held for ransom. Jarod traces the call from the kidnapper and Nancy manages to drop a clue to their whereabouts. It takes way too long for anyone to pick up on it, not to mention to follow-up on the distinctive snake-skin boots the kidnapper wears, but eventually Jarod catches up with the rest of us and identifies the deputy as the culprit.

Nancy's gotten herself untied and taken a couple of swings at the kidnappers by the time they arrive. The deputy chases Leigh into the woods, but Jarod catches up to him and saves her.

Miss Parker follows another trail, an email from Jarod about Edna Raines. By the time they find her, Mr. Raines is by her bedside; she's dead from an overdose. Sydney doesn't really buy the suicide theory. Some more digging suggests that what Jarod wants them to do is dig up Catherine Parker's grave.

What they find is an empty coffin.

What We Learned

• People in Hell are looking for ice water.
• Mom's not a complete moron.
• You can tell Newt to shut up all you want, Corn Man still coming.
• Raines never protected anyone but himself.
• Graveyards are always covered in mist.
• Sometimes the things that scare you the most can be the things that save your life.

What Did I Think?

I was just so impressed that mom actually dropped a clue, freed herself and took a healthy swing at her captors.