If You Ever Want a French Lesson

Ringer Episode Review

In which Bridget pulls a killer bluff and Siobhan loses her shirt. As close as Ringer has come to character focus as the episode revolves around the question of whether Bridget can trust Andrew.

What Happened

Bridget is resolved to stay in New York until she discovers that Andrew has a framed copy of the photo of Siobhan that the killer was carrying. Deciding that Andrew must be involved in the attempt to kill her, Bridget starts snooping around. This includes a visit to Siobhan's potential divorce lawyer - a move that prompts Andrew to 1) explode 2) pull out a massive guilt trip and 3) sulk in his office instead of taking his wife to the ballet. Eventually, Bridget discovers that half of the Upper East Side has a copy of that photo. It was Siobhan's Christmas Card last year.

In the middle of all this, Bridget gets a call on the killer's cell phone from a strange man who insists that she return the device immediately. And then he will totally go away and never bother her again. Not believing that for a second, Bridget risks another meeting with Agent Machelo. She asks him vague questions about the case, but after he leaves - frustrated - she tells the mysterious stranger that if anything happens to her, the cell phone will wind up on Machelo's desk.

In other news... Machelo can't get a search warrant. Henry tries withdrawing his money from Andrew's firm, but Olivia manipulates the situation so that he can't. The mobster in Wyoming kidnaps and beats Malcolm, who still has Bridget's messages on his cell phone. And Gemma... has a hangover.

And off in Paris, Siobhan is suffering from morning sickness at night because she still hasn't adjusted to the time difference.

The Good

• Bridget using Machelo as a bluff. That sequence worked for me, from her hustling into a cab and calling his office just before a commercial break, through their confrontation, to her laying it out for the mysterious man. That was clever and effective. More of that, please.

The Bad

• And less wandering through deserted alleys based on a scrawled note on a business card left by the husband you think might be trying to kill you. It doesn't count as dramatic tension when I am only tense because I'm yelling at the TV about how dumb the characters are.

The Cliche

• The silent phone call. Siobhan calls Henry while staring morosely at a pregnancy test, then doesn't say anything. If I were Henry, I would have hung up the first time there wasn't an answer. Who stays on the phone to silence these days? Usually it just means that the automated dialer is transferring you over to the telemarketer.

What Did I Think?

Reality check: No. way did they tailored down a designer gown meant to be worn by a model (six feet) to fit Bridget (five feet). In less than twelve hours. Forget about the skirt length, the entire waist and bust dimensions would have to be rearranged to suit her. Can you imagine how much fabric goes into one of those dresses?

And Bridget gets all teary at Andrew, saying it was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for her? Um. Bridget. What about the guy who offered to go on the run and protect you from the killer mobster and the FBI?

I get that Bridget is hoping against everything that Andrew - that someone! - can be the person she can trust because heaven knows that she really needs an ally. I kind of hope Andrew is a good guy, because the alternative is Henry and his puffy hair, but handing out designer clothes does not mean someone loves you. Just means Andrew knew a guy who knew a guy who knew the designer would be angling for free publicity. Jeez, Bridget. Show a little more self-esteem than that.